[Journal of the Simplified Spelling Society, J31 2002/2, pp13,14]
[See Journal and Newsletter articles by Zé do Rock.]
[Zé do Rock: see Journals, Newsletters, Personal View, Web link.]

A Romanian Holiday in a Romanesque Notation.

zé do rock.

Many Horscars on dã Europeǎni Roads.

Writing English in a Romanian Orthography.

This is not the notation that Zé proposes for the Journal but it is a potentially good one for ESL students. Some of the reviewers found this story difficult to read partly because the orthography changes as the story progresses. There are some regularities as the author explains below:
ǎp ǎgo
che, châ
sec, cei
âpe, ep

'A' is plein /a/ as în 'father', bǎt scurt. De ,ǎ' is mor or les laic ǎ shwa, bǎt it can be stresd. As în italiona, ,ce' and ,ci' ar pronunţat ,chay' (widaut glaid) and ,chee'. If yu want to spel 'ke' and 'ki' yu hay to spel 'che' and 'chi'. Of cors dey dont hav 'th', naidǎr în saund nor în rittãna language. 'E' is /e/, for f-sunetul (saund) dey alweys use 'f' (fenomen), 'ge' and 'gi' ar soft, if yu want /ge/ and /gi/ yu spel 'ghe' and 'ghi'. H is alweys pronunţat, ,i' is /i/ and can also be used for /y/ (so dey wud spel ,ies' for,yes'). And finalul 'i' aftǎr a consonantǎ is very weakly pronunţat, usually it just softens sunetul precedinghei consonantǎ. Dublu 'ii' is lung, triplu is a bit lungǎr. 'J' is as in franceza, wici meens dat dey spel 'garaj'. 'K' is used only for 'kilometru' and ǎdǎr kilo-wǎrde. 'O' is alweys scurt, 'q'-wǎrde dont exista (quality = colitate, language (lingua) = limba, four (quatro) = patru), ,r' is italian and alweys pronunţat, 'ş' is voiceless, 'ş' is 'sh', 'ţ' is 'ts' (aldo dey dont spel 'piţa' for pizza), 'u' is /u/, 'w' dǎsnt exista, 'x' is /ks/ and only 'z' is used for sunetul /z/.

The complete story is available on Saundspel. See Links page.

This snippet from Zé's story is written in a pseudo Romanian script with a few Romanian endings and words thrown in. It represents how English might look if it were written in the Romanian writing system.

Deer braziliani frendi!
a horscar foto
a horscar foto

Ai wud laik to tell yu ǎ bit ǎbout Europa, for exemplu România. Because ai'm cǎming from there rait nau.

Mai departing point was Muenchen, in Germania. Wen yu tell peopǎl that yu'r going to Romania, yu faind out that evry secǎnd persoanǎ in dis cǎntry is ǎ român. Or was born there. Bǎt it cud also be that their anscestori wǎr from there, or hǎr hǎsbǎnd, or thǎ dautǎr.

After thǎ big bang in socialistii stati, ai thaut it wud obviǎsly be easy to travel into dese cǎntries. Hau rong ai was! Ex-soviet republichele do as if they wud still liv ǎndǎr Stalin and evry turist wud be ǎ spion. Yu need thausends av papǎrs and invitaþii from ǎ nativ or ǎ complet pachet from ǎ travel agenþie, with thǎ whole jǎrny rezervat and payd, wich meens flaits, treini and hoteli. Ãdǎr ex-socialisti cǎntris loosǎnd regulele a bit, bǎt still want ǎ vizǎ, exept from EU-stati, because they dont want to hav any probleme with thǎ EU. Bǎt then they ask 10 taims mor mǎny from thǎ ǎdǎrs. This is very stupid. Doing laik that, they fraiten many turisti off. It is not that they ar swimming în mǎny & dont want turisti there. No, this is simplu stupiditate.

Ai as brazilian need of cors ǎ vizǎ. There is ǎ huge craud în frǎnt ǎf consulatul, ai need 2 ore (hours) to sǎbmit mai aplicaþie. Nobǎdy speacs germana, and dis consulat is în Germania, and România has milioni âv germana-speacVârs! Then ai wait wân week, go there âgain and hav to wait ǎnǎthǎr 2 ore to get mai vizǎ.

Then ai remember that we hav to go thru Hungary. So ai go to the hungarian konzulátus. At thǎ wall there is ǎ message: 'The forms must be written clearly and not in cyrillic. Besides, the aplication is invalid.' Funny, dese europaiek.

Picture of Zé do Rock
Zé do Rock
Meibe dey went ,oderwais', not, bisaids', but who knows. Wen ai come nearer to de caunter, ai see anoder message and faind aut dat de hungarianök want 85 euro for a tranzit-vízum. In de end of de 80's ai wanted to travel dru Mongolia, but de vízum cost 60 Doicse Mark, ai refused to go. If dey dont want turistek dey shudnt get eny. Bai oat taim it was de most expensiv vízum ai had herd abaut. Nau de hungarianök want 85 EURO for a tranzit-vízum! No no, ai wont coopereit here. Dís píple ǎr confusing kapitalizmus wid piratery!

Ai looc for ǎnǎthǎr way aut. Iugoslavii and croatii dont asc for ǎ vizǎ from braziliani, maybe we can go.

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